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Bad Day for Lucifer

Lucifer was having a bad day. He and God had been a great team for countless billions of years. Together they had created many worlds, many universes, many dimensions, many realms of spirit. Always it was God who had the big ideas and Lucifer who would implement his vision. And now, here it was happening all over again. This time God had come up with something a little different. A little more special: Earth. But what was in it for him? Just the same old, same old? God gets all the power and glory. Lucifer gets to be his shadow.

Earth was going to be pretty cool. There would be the usual ‘big bang’ in the Spirit that Lucifer always enjoyed. Big fireworks. But this time there would be a new realm of light called physical. God had created an image of himself called Heaven to carry the positive polarity of the creation, and he had no idea whatsoever what might be possible with Heaven in Earth. That was the point. That was up to Lucifer. God just wanted to have an adventure. The idea was to place a hologram of himself inside five negative layers of consciousness, and let Lucifer loose. They would call this creation Man.

Man would have access to all thirty-two levels of God’s consciousness: twenty-seven above the soul, the soul itself being the first positive level that vibrated in harmony with God’s voice, aka the Word. Below this were the unconscious, the mind, the emotions, the imagination, and the physical body: the five powerfully creative, negative, psychic realms each with an awesome god in charge, all answerable to Lucifer. Man, God’s pride and joy, could now use the power of all those inner gods to create pretty much what he wanted in the negative worlds. Not negative in the sense of bad or wrong, negative as in the opposite of positive — you know, like how a battery creates a current of energy.

While Man would not be given free will, that being God’s prerogative, he would have free choices.

Free choices, thought Lucifer! Hmm, that’s going to be interesting.

God was going to sit in heaven and watch the show. Lucifer was in charge of all the five negative realms of creation. ‘Impress me,’ God commanded Lucifer – ‘Let there be light!’

And there was light. But not for long.

Bad Day for God

Eons later, God convened a summit meeting. All the archangels, ascended masters and highest spiritual beings were present: Adam, Abraham, Melchizedek, Hermes, Akhenaton, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, the Apostles, including John the Beloved… even Jesus Christ was called. Darkness was over the deep face of God.

‘What the hell are we going to do about the Satan problem?’ he demanded from the assembly. Following his betrayal and fall, Lucifer was now called by his shadow name, Satan.

‘First I give him my trust and the best job in the universe next to my own. Then he ensnares all my precious little sheep in his confounded labyrinth of funny mirrors and this ‘good and evil’ nonsense. No, Adam, no tears please, I don’t blame you, as well you know, I have totally forgiven your original sin. There are no failures. You all did a great job of building a rock-solid foundation for my final masterpiece, Jesus, to thwart Satan and free my babies. But after all that, all that scourging, humiliation, the ass, the crucifixion, resurrection, and the ascension what did we get? Did we get freedom and liberation? Did we get peace on earth and goodwill towards all mankind? Did we get unconditional forgiveness for all regardless of race, creed, colour and sexual proclivity? Did we get all our children home where they belong?’

His voice trailed off, and there was the sound of suppressed chuckling from the assembly. God caught the irony of it and really struggled himself to keep a straight face.

‘No, we did not get what we wanted, what we gave up everything for… We got Christianity!’

God totally lost it. He was laughing so hard the floods were cascading down his face. Jesus, once again, came to the rescue.

‘OK, look, Christianity’s not that bad. I mean it could be a hell of a lot worse. Let us remember they know not what they do. The thing of it is, we had to make the Bible sufficiently encrypted that Beelzebub and his guys would not be able to see the hidden keys and not extirpate the forbidden truth from the scriptures. But unfortunately so few people actually could understand the truth within, it’s made scant difference to the dire planetary situation. Things are looking so grim down there that unless we come up with a new plan to raise the consciousness, the entire planet will destroy itself around the year 2020. ‘

Jesus looked across to John and gave him an almost imperceptible nod, his cue to speak.

‘I have an idea,’ spake John. ‘Germain is finishing up his latest galaxy and has offered to reincarnate onto Earth as a poet and playwright. He will take a swing at completely reimagining the scripture into a more accessible, more easily digested form to plant the seeds of truth in all mankind. There’s a person to be born on January 22nd, 1561 who will be ideally placed to receive Germain’s soul and be the pen for his sword of truth, as it were.’

God was now beaming with delight. ‘And by what name might we know this person, who will undertake the task of rewriting the scripture, John, my good fellow?’

‘Bacon, I believe,’ said John. ‘Yes, Bacon.’

There was a roar of approval from the assembly. John was triumphantly hoisted upon the shoulders of the masters and paraded round the auditorium.

But when the cheering finally died down, there was one voice, a voice with an unmistakable stutter, a voice that trembled with rage and fury. ‘B-B-Bacon! B-B-Bacon!’ He bellowed like a minotaur. ‘You would have my T-Torah rewritten by B-B-Bacon!’ As he pushed his way to the front, Moses’ magic staff transformed into a spear. He stood before God and shook it in fury.

God said, ‘I understand, old friend. In honour of you and your long-suffering people, this poetic genius who will finally free the children of Israel, will henceforth be known as Shakespeare.’

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